Archives for February 2013

Porn on the iPod – Check their device, protect their purity | Block iPod Porn

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Feb 27 0

block porn on the ipod is a concern

porn on the ipod is a concern

Internet access in your hand

Block iPod Porn!

iPods are neat devices – They can play music, videos, games and many other things. My 9 year old son received one for his birthday. He loves to make zombie movies and chase the cat or dog around the house. His favorite music on loaded onto it and he loves rocking out to tunes from Skillet and Kutless.

Just tonight, I was doing homework with him and grabbed his iPod to check out what apps he had and what else he was doing with it. I went into Safari and found about 9 open windows – not unusual. I also browsed his internet history. I was a bit shocked. It seems that he did a search today on ‘girls in bikinis’ and another on ‘naked girl pictures’.

Now, given my history I’m starting to think “Oh Lord, He is starting on this now”. I was pleased to find that in his search for the naked pictures, he hit an Open DNS blocked site page. Yea! On the bikini girl search he only got as far as a mild photo in the google image essearch. Great! I calmly asked him if he searched for that stuff and after some studdering and stammering, he said him and his friend did the search this afternoon. I told him that he should stay away from those searches and internet sites. He did not really see anything, so I don’t have to explain any images to him!

The next thing I did was install Covenant Eyes for iPhone & iPod. We are big users and proponents of Covenant Eyes (you can read my covenant eyes review here). It works by becoming the browser for the iPod when you lock out Safari. Please stay tuned for my upcoming full review of the covenant eyes app for iPhone & iPod. After securing his iPod, my wife and I need to discuss how and when I need to sit him down and talk a bit more in depth about sex and women. He is only 9, but these days that may be the right time to get to them and give them a biblical view of sex.

What did I learn from this? First off, I am glad Open DNS blocked the porn site that was supposed to load! Second, I was not doing my parental job to secure his iPod sooner! Even though it has been a month, I should have loaded the covenant eyes on there sooner. If he had been subjected to viewing porn, I would only have myself to blame. I don’t want him falling into the same traps I did as a young boy. He has the potential to be a man of God with the correct view of sex and women, without the distorted view I had.

Thank God another crisis avoided! You cannot tell me that we are not under attack in this society! Read about our first attack and crisis avoided; when an 8 year old receives a Playboy offer in the mail.

Please leave comments below- Have you had a similar experience? When did you have the talk with your child?

Is Porn Cheating?

By R PikeLeave a Comment

Feb 5 0

Is Porn Cheating?

Is Porn Cheating?

Does it really matter whether we are physically intimate?

Last time we explored the different types of affairs and analyzed whether or not they were cheating. I made the point that since the actions of the one made the other feel hurt and betrayed they were considered cheating. Does the classification of actual cheating depend solely on the way the offended spouse’s feelings and reactions?

Whenever we think of cheating we generally consider the act to be mainly physical. When someone says that he cheated on her, they usually mean he had sex with another woman. That phrase is generally interpreted in the same way.

I think we could all agree that having sex with someone other than your spouse is indeed cheating. Sex is the most intimate way that we humans can connect with each other. There is an actual bonding at levels beyond just the physical. There is an emotional and spiritual connection made. When you have sex with someone you are giving yourself to them in the most vulnerable way humanly possible. The exchange between the couple is physical, emotional and spiritual.

Let’s bring pornography up as it relates to having sex with someone. Pornography does not connect you physically with someone, but it does connect you emotionally and spiritually.

Every image gets seared into your mind. The physical pleasure along with gratifying images makes them so hard to forget. You loose your ability to emotionally connect with real people. There are no emotions shared with pornography. It is one sided where the person engaged in watching it will ‘treat’ the person in the video any way they please. This treatment is many times abusive and objective. This one way emotional exchange disconnects the user from interactions with real people.

The spiritual side of using pornography is one of the scariest. I don’t know whether you give away some of your spirit or take on some dark spirit while using pornography. I tend to lean towards taking on some evil spirits because it will start to change you. Pornography is a dark world. You enter in through enticing seemingly harmless images, but get dragged down into a dark place that will change you. Anyhow, I hope you can see the reason I view pornography as cheating without even delving into the feelings of the spouse.

If you don’t have sexual relations outside of your marriage, but have real close intimate friendships with the opposite sex you are cheating. I know that you might disagree with that statement, but hear me out.

Marriage bonds a couple together not only physically in sex, but spiritually and emotionally as well. Yes the act of sex bonds in the same ways, but there is power in the bond of marriage.

God said that the two will become one when He speaks about marriage. He was not just speaking about sex. Believe it or not, God views a husband and wife as one, a unit. You know the phrase – “My better half”. There is a magical joining of the two in the physical, emotional and spiritual realms.

If a spouse seeks to emotionally join themselves to another person through relational intimacy, they are breaking one of the bonds of a marriage. Our spouses were meant to be our closest companion on earth with whom we can share anything. An emotional affair breaks that bond in the marriage and bonds with another.

I know what you may say – That’s just emotional, there is no spiritual and physical connection. How many emotional affairs wind up turning into physical affairs? I don’t know the statistics, but I would bet it is high. If emotional affairs are not stopped, the natural progression is into sexual relations.

Now I realized that I did not yet touch on the feelings of hurt and betrayal experienced by the spouse of someone into pornography or having an emotional affair. If you felt betrayed and hurt, does it matter what excuses or rational is used to explain to you that they did not actually cheat on you? Does the technical definition of cheating sway your feelings?

In my case, you could have told me that my wife was not actually cheating. I mean, she wasn’t sleeping with this other guy. She was however having private conversations with someone I didn’t know. It made me feel threatened, betrayed and hurt. It did not matter one bit if she came out and said ‘But we are not sleeping together’.

The trust was broken. Our bond of marriage was weakened. She had attempted to give herself emotionally to another person instead of me.

What it boils down to is your relationship with your spouse. If you love them, you would not want to hurt them, even unintentionally. If anything you did was offensive to your spouse, love would make you want to stop those actions even if you felt you did nothing wrong. My wife does love me because she stopped communications with this other man and was seriously sorry about it.

Maybe the real test of whether it is an affair or not is the impact it has on the bond of marriage. If it does not weaken any of the bonds of marriage, then it is not cheating. If the actions damage or seek to weaken any of the marriage bonds, then it is an affair.