Cleveland Kidnapper; Sex & Porn Addict

Wow – This week was a big news week in Cleveland.  Three girls who have been missing for ten years were found inside a Seymour Avenue home on Cleveland’s west side.

My wife was on the computer and told me the breaking news:  ”Amanda Berry and Gina DeJesus were both rescued from the same house!”  I couldn’t believe it.  Being a resident of the greater Cleveland area, I have seen the news stories on the vigils and leads over the years on these two girls who were abducted.  Gina and Amanda’s families were vigilant in keeping these girl’s stories alive in the neighborhood and media over the years.  If you live in Cleveland you could not help but know the stories of these young ladies.

I was very happy to hear such good news!  They were found alive and returned to their families.  All three women will need lots of prayers for healing of such trauma they have experienced.

There has been much news this past week on Ariel Castro, the alleged kidnapper and captor.  What a normal guy he was to those he interacted with!  He was the guy who visited neighborhood barbecues and performed in the local salsa band.  Who would have ever suspected the dark side this guy hid from everyone?

I have said to many people that I believe anyone is capable of anything.  Story after story, you see people interviewed on the news that say something like – “I never would have suspected this guy was into this.”

Double lives- we can be the church going, civic volunteer on the outside, but inside we hide our demons of sexual addiction and violence.  What a dichotomy!

We all do this to some extent.  We put on these masks to hide our real feelings, hurt and addictions.  Behind closed doors people hide the shame of that person they wish they really weren’t.  Sometimes this other person is a polar opposite of who they wish they were, but other times, it is embraced.

Mr. Castro admitted to having a sex addiction which led to his kidnapping and holding these three woman hostage.  They were his sex slaves held for his own pleasure.  How sick is that?

A guy just doesn’t go out and do this on a whim, he works his way up to doing something as drastic as this.  I hypothesize that he was a voracious porn addict that drifted down the addiction trail of increasingly extreme sex acts that he had to take to the outside to keep up that ‘buzz’ that pornography once gave him. (see my post on the progression of porn addiction)

I would say that he started with pornography and worked his way up to the point where he needed extreme sex to satisfy his cravings.  As the news keeps coming out, I would be really surprised if they don’t find any pornography in this guy’s house and on his computer.  Not just ‘normal’ porn, but extreme stuff such as children and animals.

Let’s see if my suspicions are correct.  Even if they prove to be untrue, this should serve as a warning to pornography addicts out there.  You never know how far you will go with this addiction until you can’t turn back and have gone too far.  Don’t let this happen to you.

 

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Posted in Porn addiction, Progression of Pornography | 1 Comment

Porn on the iPod – Check their device, protect their purity

porn on the ipod is a concern

Internet access in your hand

iPods are neat devices – They can play music, videos, games and many other things.  My 9 year old son received one for his birthday.  He loves to make zombie movies and chase the cat or dog around the house.  His favorite music on loaded onto it and he loves rocking out to tunes from Skillet and Kutless.

Just tonight, I was doing homework with him and grabbed his iPod to check out what apps he had and what else he was doing with it.   I went into Safari and found about 9 open windows – not unusual.  I also browsed his internet history.  I was a bit shocked.  It seems that he did a search today on ‘girls in bikinis’ and another on ‘naked girl pictures’.

Now, given my history I’m starting to think “Oh Lord, He is starting on this now”.   I was pleased to find that in his search for the naked pictures, he hit an Open DNS blocked site page.  Yea!  On the bikini girl search he only got as far as a mild photo in the google image essearch.  Great! I calmly asked him if he searched for that stuff and after some studdering and stammering, he said him and his friend did the search this afternoon.  I told him that he should stay away from those searches and internet sites.  He did not really see anything, so I don’t have to explain any images to him!

The next thing I did was install Covenant Eyes for iPhone & iPod.  We are big users and proponents of Covenant Eyes (you can read my covenant eyes review here).  It works by becoming the browser for the iPod when you lock out Safari. Please stay tuned for my upcoming full review of the covenant eyes app for iPhone & iPod. After securing his iPod, my wife and I need to discuss how and when I need to sit him down and talk a bit more in depth about sex and women.  He is only 9, but these days that may be the right time to get to them and give them a biblical view of sex.

What did I learn from this?  First off, I am glad Open DNS blocked the porn site that was supposed to load!  Second, I was not doing my parental job to secure his iPod sooner!  Even though it has been a month, I should have loaded the covenant eyes on there sooner.  If he had been subjected to viewing porn, I would only have myself to blame.  I don’t want him falling into the same traps I did as a young boy.  He has the potential to be a man of God with the correct view of sex and women, without the distorted view I had.

Thank God another crisis avoided!  You cannot tell me that we are not under attack in this society!  Read about our first attack and crisis avoided; when an 8 year old receives a Playboy offer in the mail.

Please leave comments below-  Have you had a similar experience?  When did you have the talk with your child?

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Pornography Addiction in Christian Men and Women

I like to share some good vidoes when I come across them.  This one depicts Christian men and women who admit to bing addicted to pornography.  Refer back to my post on the steps to overcome an addiction to porn.

These men and women enrolled in the setting captives free program – One which I highly recommend.  Please watch and leave your comments below

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Sanctity of Life and pornography – Does porn respect life?

This is Sanctity of Life weekend in the United States.  What that means is that we regard life as a sacred gift from God and it is precious.  God is the creator of life and humans were created in His image.  This means we are made in His likeness and we have a high value.

The Sanctity of Life as we will look at deals with how pornography portrays an opposing view of life than God does.  In pornography, people are objects instead of living beings with soul and spirit.  Pornography portrays sex as a conquest and the woman as a mere piece of meat.

I’ve heard it said that we tend to use people and love things instead of loving people and using things.  Pornography uses women and men as objects to satisfy our flesh.  It ends up using them for the physical and mental satisfaction of control, gratification and physical release.

To love people and value them does not include sacrificing them up to peering eyes of thousands.  Would you want your wife or daughter to be used in such a way as pornography does?  It violates their value as a person and tears them down with degrading acts.

Humans should value each other and not support the humiliation of another for their own gratification.  God would not humiliate us, nor does he care to see us treat some people as less valuable as others.  Perhaps we should look at adults in pornography with as much disgust as we do for children who are abusively made to do such acts.  Innocence aside, how much difference is there between the two?

Look that woman in the porn movie in the eyes while she is in the act.  Are you looking into a soul less creature or into painful eyes?  The eyes that are windows to the soul of a woman who is created in the image of God – she is a creation of the almighty and made in his image.

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Posted in Internet Pornography, victims of Pornography | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

8 year old receives Playboy Magazine offer in the mail

In a suburb of Cleveland, Ohio a third grader receives a Playboy Magazine offer in the mail!  Should you ever doubt the predatory nature of pornographers, here is case in point. 

The young boy is actually my son.  Thankfully, my wife retrieved the mail with the enclosed offer!  Usually my son gets the mail for her, but not on this day.  She was so outraged that she has called and emailed whoever will listen, including Playboy Magazine.

The advertisement was provocative enough that my wife did not want even me to see it.  I sat and imagined what his response would have been when he saw a half-naked woman on a piece of mail addressed to him.  There are 2 responses that he would have a choice from, in my mind.

The first and ideal response would have been for him to show his mother and to have her quickly whisk the offer away.  Then she would praise him for showing her and using good judgment.  She’d have to explain to him the sinfulness in such magazines and how awful it was for them to send out such offers.

The second response would have been for him to hide the offer and not tell anyone.  The offer would be hidden in a secret spot and he would bring it out to ponder and look at the ad.  What a dilemma it would cause for him!  The photo is appealing to him, but he does not fully understand why.  It also makes him feel dirty for looking at it and feeling the need to hide it. 

At his age I know what I would have done – the second response.  It was what I did when I found my Dad’s magazines. 

I am very thankful that my wife intercepted the mail today.  It seriously is getting me thinking on when and how I have to share with him about ‘the birds and the bees’.  I need to start pouring into him and modeling for him the proper way to treat women – more intentionally.  I need to give him respect for women so that later on when he does get exposed to pornography, he will know for certain it is wrong and will respond to it as in the first scenario above.

Parents, we have a responsibility to protect our kids and mold them into God fearing, people loving adults.  Please reflect on what you would do, or would have done in this situation.

I welcome all your comments below!

 

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Posted in Internet Pornography, Media, Sexual temptation | Tagged , | 2 Comments

Pornography is the New Drug

 

This video, produced by fight the new drug sums up how pornography acts on our bodies the same way that drugs do.   Give it a watch and understand why we need to fight against pornography and keep it out our homes, out of our computers and off our television.  If you have not had a good reason to install an internet filter on your computer, (like covenant eyes) this should persuade you.  You do not want your children falling into pornography addiction like I did and so many others are daily, right now.

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Posted in Covenant Eyes, Effects of Using pornography, Uncategorized | Tagged , , | Leave a comment