Evidence of Her Husband’s Porn Stash

evidence husband porn stash

Reader Question regarding her husband’s Porn Stash on his device.

Mary asks if his stash of images and videos is on his personal Sansa media device.

evidence husband porn stash

I have found tons of evidence of porn watching and voyeurism from myhusband. This has been going on for years, I have decided to leave himbut before I do I want to show him everything I found. I asked to seehis Sansa Fuzzy because I found out he had one. He says there is onlymusic and no porn or pictures. The memory card is missing and I wouldbet my life he down loaded on it and hid the card. AM I RIGHT? Itonly had music on there but I know he still is watching it. ~Mary

 

Mary, I think that his secrecy and protection of his Sansa device may indicate he is using it to watch porn. I understand privacy and all, but anyone who hides or is overprotective of their iPod, cell phone or other device from their spouse is probably hiding something.

I’m guessing that the memory card is what the movies are stored on and the Sansa won’t work without it. He is clever in hiding the memory card, but whatcomputer is he using to download the movies from onto the card? If you need concrete proof, find that computer.

You say you have decided to leave him and want to show him everything you havefound. It sounds like his Sansa is one piece of evidence you have against him. Does he think that you don’t know about his porn watching? Has he been denying it all these years and now you have the evidence to confront him with?

I can see your point in the evidence gathering. You don’t want to be wrong inyour confrontation with him. When I suspected my wife was cheating on me I gathered some evidence from the computer and showed her. She had denied any wrong doing and the evidence I had was a bit sketchy. It was enough to confirm she was at least chatting with another man.

The evidence didn’t hold up and she was very angry at my spying on her to get that information. I believe she still holds that against me. Some good advice I received and will pass along to anyone reading this is that you shouldn’t spy or gather evidence until you decide what you are going to do oneway or the other. I knew she was chatting with another guy, but it burned me up inside because I couldn’t tell for sure one way or another if she was having an affair.

If he is using porn, what will you do with that information? Confront him andthen leave him? Help him enroll in a treatment program? If it’s not porn then why did you have your suspicions? Are you generally insecure or is he not trustworthy?

Mary, this doesn’t sound good for your relationship. I hope you have made theright decision. Good luck

Comments

  1. my boyfriend of 2 years recently admitted to watching porn whilst being on our relationship. once seeing how hurt i was, he has changed his story to he stopped watching 6 months with in our relationship. I have found a lot of porn he has had stored in the past, a worrying amount of different pictures/videos. He shows so many signs of being addicted. I need a way to see if he is still viewing porn without him knowing I’m seaching as he is very good with hiding things on his laptop

  2. new here. my gut feeling tells me that my husband of soon to be 20 years, has an addiction to watching kinky/porn videos on his work/home and probably cell phone.

    about 4 years ago, i found out (by searching the computer history) that he was on those type of site. so did our oldest daughter, she saw the same thing while searching the history for school stuff.

    i asked him about it and got upset and said that it was nothing to worry about that all men are visual and not a big deal. i trusted him and let it go. fast forward, about 2 years ago, he developed an addiction to buying tvs (buying and returning). it sparked something in my mind to think that maybe he is dealing with porn addiction as well. our sex life is ok. though i am always willing to be with him. he says his drive is low.

    recently though, i have this gut feeling that something is off. he gets upset for any little thing. says he has anger issues. says that he is not happy with his work, not being able to buy a home, not have a garage this and that. i tell him that he is not the only one that feels like that, we all want better, but not all can have it all and that what matters is that we are together as a family (have 4 children) etc… i even told him that i am starting to feel as if he is not happy with me anymore, i get a feeling of regrets. he regrets having 4 children. regrets marrying me. etc… he said to me that it is not so. another reason i have a gut feeling is because he started to kiss me differently, more rough. when i asked him about “when was the last time you saw porn” he got all upset and started to tell me that i have issues (just took the whole question and spun it to me, i’m the one with issues).

    i need to confirm if he is watching that stuff online. i cannot be with a man who does that. it is heartbreaking to even think this way. any advise is appreciated. thanks!

    • Sometimes a porn addiction will display itself with anger issues. Its because he is ashamed and dealing with feelings of not being good enough, etc. Keep on encouraging him the way you are. Just because he got upset when you asked him the question, doesn’t mean he is watching online porn. Was the context of the situation a heated one? If you asked him that question while asking if he regrets marrying you, etc, then he was already on the ropes and didn’t want to be piled on with anything more. It’s better to approach this whole situation from a point of concern for the whole family and porn. You all will put software on your phones, laptops, computers to keep the whole family safe. If you do it this way, he won’t feel like you are targeting him. Use some article on the widespread porn and it’s effects as a starter to the conversation. If you think he is doing porn, the only real way is to search history and maybe use a tool like the ones in this article: http://www.abattleplan.com/2012/06/how-to-confirm-your-husband-watching-porn-the-net/

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